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"People have guns and they just don't care about anything," says NOFX vocalist/bassist Fat Mike of the band's violent
hometown San Francisco.
"Some Irish guy was at a bank getting money out and was getting robbed. The guy was like, 'I'm not giving you my money',
so they killed him! People just watched as he got beaten to death with bats!
The first corpse of 1995 was found just after midnight on New Year's Eve under a flyover a few blocks from the
headquarters of Mike's increasingly successful record label Fat Wreck Chords.
Fat Mike is disappointingly in proportion and is obsessed with Cockney rhyming slang. He's been taking lessons from Brit
Punk scallywags Guns N' Wankers (now sadly defunct).
"Basically, if you live in London you can talk Cockney!" says Mike with gleeful ignorance. Mike has even added some
rhyming slang to the recent Guns N' Wankers release on his label.
"Oil!" he beams, showing me the word scratched into the vinyl. I don't get it. "Oil tankers...wankers!" he grins. Oh, yeah!
Fat Mike is wearing Punk Rock tartan bondage trousers, blissfully unaware of the fact that they went out of fashion over 15
years ago and punks couldn't afford them anyway!
Thankfully, though, the portly one gets it right more often than he gets it wrong - as Fat Wreck Chords proves beyond
doubt. Starting in 1992 with releases by Lagwagon and NOFX, the label has just moved from Mike's bedroom to this
spacious office near Oakland Bridge. Mike employs three staff including his wife, who gives him a hard time for giving stuff
away!
Fat Wreck label policy is simple: Mike signs bands he likes. He offered British oiks Snuff $30,000 to reform, and is a little
disappointed by rumors of them signing to a major label.
"I really love Snuff, so I would have put all the money I have on the line just to sign them. I don't even know how well that
record would do out here.
"I just like good songs. I did Lagwagon's first album and I wouldn't put out their second until I'd heard it. I wanna hear the
songs before I put 'em out."
Aren't you behaving like a major label by doing that?
"Er, yeah!" Mike laughs. "But I don't think a band should have half a good album. We have this band called 88 Fingers
Louie. They have two singles on the label, but I won't do their album until they write 12 good songs. I'm sorry, but I don't
wanna put out crap!"
What if the band thinks it's the best thing they've ever done?
"Then they can go to another label!" says Mike. "See, major labels will put out anything they think they can sell. If they don't
like a band but they know it's gonna sell, they'll put it out.
"I don't do that. I put out bands I like and songs I like, so I don't look at it like I'm telling bands what to do. I had a chance to
sign that band 7 Year Bitch; they sent me their seven-inch and I was like, 'I don't wanna put you guys out!'. It's terrible!
"But it sells, y'know? They sold 30 or 40,000, which is as much as a lot of my bands are selling. But I don't like that shit! I
wanna have one of the labels where people go, 'All their stuff's good - I'll buy it cos it's on this label!"
And if the label's doing good business, you should see Fat Mike's band! Yes, NOFX's latest album 'Punk In Drublic' has sold
over 250,000 copies. No doubt they've been offered loads of cash to leave Epitaph!
"Loads!" affirms Mike. "We were offered 1.5 million for three records - a lot of money, but we're not taking it. "We thought
about it," he adds honestly. "When someone offers you that much money, you've gotta think about it."
But it can be a bad career move. Bad Religion seem to have lost a lot of fans since signing to a major.
"Well, they're selling more records!" reckons Mike. "But it's not fans, it's just people who heard them on the radio and aren't
gonna stick with them. We're playing for our fans and we're making good money. We don't need anything else."
Fat Mike may have got a little fatter on the success of NOFX, but he understands about honesty in Punk Rock. Bad Religion
didn't just sign to a major. They were seen to lie to their fans. That hurts. And as for label mates Rancid nearly leaving the
fold...
"They wanted the stardom," says Mike with a hint of a sneer. "You could tell. They went to dinner with Madonna! But then
they got all these articles about how stupid they were.
"They were this close," Mike indicates with an all-too-small gap between his fingers. "And the reason they didn't was
because I had a talk with them, and so did Dexter from Offspring.
"Rancid aren't selling as many records as us or Offspring. They're not making as much money and they're bummed! I said,
'Look, by your next record you'll be selling tons and making lots of money - you'll be living off it'."
Offspring, as Mike points out, are all millionaires now on the strength of one hit song and some rather drab live
performances.
"They suck!" says Mike bluntly. "They're no good live."
But what if you get as big as them?
"I don't think that's gonna happen," he muses. "I don't think my voice is commercial at all. It's too fucking whiny!
"And we didn't send our video to MTV. They wanted us to, they actually called, but the other day they had this thing shown
on MTV called 'The Punk Edition'. Oh, was that bad!
"We're happy where we are," ponders the rotund one. "If we ever did have a hit song, we wouldn't play much bigger places
than we do now. It's hard to say what you'd do in the future, but we're not trying to be huge."
Nirvana said they never wanted to be that big.
"I think they knew exactly what they were doing," scoffs Mike. "I heard Kurt say he was really bummed cos they couldn't play
small places anymore. Bullshit! You can play wherever you want!
"Nirvana weren't punkers to start with. They were hippies. Then they got into the Punk thing.
"You can make your own rules if you want to!"